Our Birth Story

So it been a while since I last wrote anything and I really wanted to write down some events and feelings that I had while giving birth and becoming a new mom. 

The Beginning 

I had the hardest time sleeping the night before the boys came. I was so excited and nervous, ready to be done being pregnant and scared out of my mind to be a mother. I called the hospital at 5 a.m. on April 14th to schedule my induction. (I guess the hospital gets overwhelmed with pregnant ladies so they can't schedule a time till the day of the induction to make sure they can fit you in.....it's Utah..)

They told us to come in at 6:30 a.m. I didn't hesitate at that, the sooner the better! So we got up and got ready to go to the hospital. 

Once we got checked in and I had done the normal bathroom rituals they have you do I began the 12 hour journey of becoming a mother of two........

They started the petocin at 7 a.m. and I got an epidural at 9:45 a.m. I wanted to watch them give me the epidural, but they told me to put my head down and not move. They wouldn't even let Peder watch. I guess to many people have passed out. 

Our nurse was amazing!!! Her name was Lori and she was just so wonderful. If I could have her at every birth I have I would. No one tells you this, but you spend most your labor with the nurse and only 5 seconds with the person to whom all your money goes to. They nurse does everything but catch the baby and break your water. Lori was so gentle, kind, and attentive. I could not have asked for a better nurse. 

Once I got the epidural I felt it take affect immediately. First my left leg went numb then my right, all the feeling was gone below my belly button except my bottom. I felt like a druggy because I had to keep hitting the button to get a boost to my epidural so my bottom would stop hurting. It finally stopped and that's when I took a nap. 

I never thought I would take a nap while I was in labor, but really I didn't have anything else to do and I hadn't slept good the night before so I was grateful for the time to sleep. It was actually pretty relaxing laying there in bed. The movies always make it look like this sweaty, crazy experience, when in all reality it is pretty low key. 

They also don't tell you that as soon as your water breaks it doesn't stop flowing!! It just keeps coming and you constantly feels like your wetting yourself.   

Around 4:30 p.m. I was ready to start pushing. I pushed for an hour before they moved me into the the OR.....Have you ever been on an OR table? They are narrow and a little difficult to push on. I had to deliver in the OR just in case they had to do an emergency C-section. It had started snowing and I could see the tiny flakes fall through a window in the OR room. It gave me something to focus my mind on as it seemed the pushing would never end. I think the earth was celebrating the birth of my two angelic boys with a blanket of pure white snow. 

After about an hour in the OR pushing and almost falling of the skinny table Fynn's little head started to come out! They brought a mirror in for me to watch so I could see the progress I was making with each push. It was such an odd feeling seeing my babies be born... I felt a little detached, but as soon as the baby was out it was amazed! The doctor cut the cord and let me look at him. He was so tiny and blue, purple, and white. His cry was so sweet and all I could think was please let him be perfect. He was quickly whisked to a table near by, by one of the many people that were in the room to take care of my babies. 

I didn't have to much time to dwell on my first baby since I had one more little guy to push out. As I looked down I noticed a unbroken membrane sticking out.... this was not good. If the sack broke there was a chance that Carsten's umbilical cord would come down before his head and the doctor would have to operate. Knowing that I wanted to avoid a C-section at all possible she told me to push, hoping that if I break the other sake the head would come out before the cord. Well, it only took three pushes and my second son entered the world. This time Peder got to cut the cord. I felt like a deflated beach ball, but a happy one at that. 

As they cleaned Carsten they laid Fynn on my chest. I was overwhelmed with the sight of a healthy baby and still couldn't believe that he had just come out of me! It was all so unreal..... I was now a mother of two beautiful baby boys. They were so small and perfect..... my little burritos

Fynn was born at 6:45 p.m. weighing 5 lbs. 7 oz. 19 inches long

Carsten was born just 11 minutes later at 6:56 p.m. weighing 6 lbs. 4 oz. 19 inches long

Carsten

Fynn

We were in the hospital for the next two days and let me tell you I didn't want to leave. It was so nice being taken care of and I didn't mind being interrupted every three or so hours. They brought me food and water. I didn't have to clean, it was heavenly. The boys were so sweet and just the best babies. I saw a side of my husband that made me love him more. They way he talked to our boys and took care of them made my heart melt. He was to gentle and loving. Carsten was constantly throwing up his food and Peder's concern was so touching.
The first month I dealt with depression. I was so stressed with school, being a new mom, and having two crying babies. It was a tough struggle and the feelings were so weird. I didn't feel connected to my boys and I just wanted to runaway. Thankfully it passed and I could find happiness being a mom. It helped that the boys started sleeping through the night when they were 6 weeks old.
My mom, sister, mother-in-law, and sister-in-law came during the first month to help me out. My ward was so attentive and helpful. I could not have asked for a better support group then those that have helped me!

Two Months Later

Now my boys are two months old and the tiny little babies that we brought home from the hospital are so big. I can't believe how fast they have grown. They laugh, smile, frown, and make my heart melt. Fynn turned form his stomach to his back when he was 1 month old. They both have such strong necks and love to hold up their heads and look around. They will stand up and Fynn likes to walk up dad's chest one step at a time. I still can't believe that I am a mom and that these are my boys.
I lost most of my belly the first week after the boys were born and yesterday I finally fit into my pre-pregnancy fat pants! I am moving up! I am doing my best to exercise and eat healthy though I struggle to produce enough milk for both boys. It has been a long road of learning and I know I still have a lot to learn.